This week we’re talking about Tom Cruise’s attempt at a mummy film, 2017’s The Mummy, a film that we agree is probably the worst we’ve ever seen. We go deep into theorizing how this became such a colossal mess, rag on how offensive certain parts of this movie are, and go on several much-needed tangents simply to avoid our main topic.

Also, why we hate “thanks for coming to the movies” messages. (Recorded October 22nd, 2023.)

(Apologies to Sofia Boutella, who we accidentally call “Sofia Boutel” a couple times.)

Today we talk about what is perhaps the most beloved Mummy film, 1999’s The Mummy, starring Brendan Fraser! We discuss how much of a right-place-right-time vibe this film has, how Rick O’Connell is basically the coolest person in the world when you’re twelve, and draw some surprising similarities between our titular character and a certain shapeshifter from Star Trek.

Also, why we hate parking in the free air spot. (Recorded October 15th, 2023.)

This week we continue our trek into mummy movies with 1959’s The Mummy. Is this movie just a mishmash of plots from the forgotten mummy sequels of the 40s? Yes! Does that mean it’s any good? No! Despite being bored to tears by this film, we manage to answer some of the real questions, like “are the mummies naked under there?” and “how much tongue is too much tongue to cut off?”

Also, why we hate being out of shape. (Recorded October 8th, 2023.)

This week we begin out monthlong mini-series/investigation into films simple titled The Mummy, starting with the original from 1932. We discuss how comparable this is to other monster movies of the time period, debate the cool factor of the Mummy’s magic powers, and get really existential over what we should be doing with the dead.

Also, why we hate corporate acquisitions. (Recorded October 1st, 2023.)

Today we’re unpacking Widows, Steve McQueen’s excellent heist movie from 2018. We discuss Viola Davis’ magnetic performance, Colin Farrell’s questionable accent, Elizabeth Debicki’s towering height, and for some reason go on an extended tangent about gambling in mobile games. 

Also, why we hate plantar warts. (Recorded September 24th, 2023.)